43 Things I Have Learned

I do not lie about my age.

I’ve always believed if you did lie about your age, you were doomed to look ten years older than you actually do. In my 43 years, I have learned many things. Some lessons have been welcome and some have been extremely hard to deal with. All in all, they have been necessary and I would not trade hard lessons for easier ones if that meant I would be less of the woman I am today. Below are 43 things I have learned so far. Some with brief observations:

1. Never feel guilty about your desires. There is absolutely nothing wrong with having desires and doing what you need to make them reality in your life. And, don’t share your heart’s desire with people who never have anything good to say. They are not worthy of that kind of insight or trust.
2. Love people with your whole heart.
3. You are enough. Period. There is nothing to justify, just know that you are.
4. Your happiness is not someone else’s responsibility. Release people from the responsibility of making you happy. It is not their job. You are the source of your happiness and it always starts with you.
5. When someone is talking to you, give them your undivided attention. Instead of thinking about how you are going to respond to them, simply listen. Put your cellphone away when your child sits next to you and says they need to talk. Be a good listener, always.
6. Be brave…especially when you are terrified. Take the f*cking leap! Better to have tried than to be paralyzed by fear and self doubt.
7. Love on a hater. Even when they don’t deserve it, love their asses. It’s good karma for you when you put love into the world. It comes back to you tenfold.
8. Take great care of yourself.
9. Choose your friends wisely. Everyone is not your friend and everyone is not for you. Move-a-body friends don’t judge you. They love you as you are and allow you to have breakdowns for two hours on the phone as they remind you that you are awesome.
10. Surround yourself with successful, positive people. The saying goes, if you have four broke friends, you will be broke friend #5. Make a conscious effort to associate with people who are doing something, going somewhere and are living examples of bad ass achievers.
11. Leap! Revisit #6
12. Crap in, crap out. That includes food, words and people.
13. Some people you have to love from a distance and others you have to tell to go to hell…in love, of course. Revist #7
14. Don’t over think things.
15. Own your awesome every single day.
16. Be your biggest cheerleader.
17. Tell people how you feel about them while they are alive. Don’t wait. I have had too many friends die in their 30s and 40s. I am telling them now that they matter to me. It doesn’t do them a whole lot of good to be told they matter when they are dead.
18. Be kind.
19. Love should not hurt, but sometimes it does.
20. Some people were never meant to be in your life. Let them go immediately.
21. Step boldly through the doors God opens for you.
22. Not every opportunity that comes your way is a good one.
23. Be true to yourself.
24. Each day is a new day with no mistakes in it. I think I first heard this from Anne of Green Gables. It’s true.
25. Do what you love.
26. Spend your time with people you love.
27. Don’t be an a$$hole on purpose.
28. If you are having a bad day, have it by yourself. Don’t put your mess on anyone else. Have your moment, then get over yourself.
29. Planning something to death does you no good if you never launch. Revisit #6 and #11
30. Fear will paralyze you if you allow it. Push through it!
31. Assumptions make an ass out of the person who lives stuck in assumptions.
32. I could give a damn what most people think of me, but I don’t give a damn.
33. If you want to know, ask.
34. The older I get, the less tolerance I have for bull$hit or people who speak, live and embody said bull$hit.
35. I have move-a-body friends I would move bodies. I love these people with my whole heart.
36. Have a theme song and dance to it frequently.
37. Muscles are cool, but strength is better. Meaning, I am committed to not only getting in shape and staying that way, but I want to be strong as well.
38. Sleep is a beautiful thing. Indulge in it frequently.
39. You can do whatever you set your mind to.
40. My mood sets the tone for my household.
41. Love your children fiercely.
42. Hugs feel so good and instantly lift your mood.
43. I matter.

As I move through another year of my life, I am taking care of me. I am committed to that. Each year, I have picked a word to act as a theme for the new year. For 2015, I selected three words that act as larger themes for all areas of my life. Each one of them plays off of one another and I am excited to live my life with more purpose and intention. I know what I want. Now, it is time to go out and get it!